From illusions God in His Mercy has ever preserved me. I felt fully recompensed for all I had gone through, and I kept saying: 'Now I am here for ever.' Mine was no passing joy, it did not fade like first illusions. I repeat that my happiness was calm and peaceful-not even the lightest breeze ruffled the tranquil waters on which my little barque sailed no cloud darkened the blue sky. I fancied myself transported to the desert. 64 64Nuns, in the spirit of poverty, avoid using the word my, as denoting private possessions so, later on, 'our lamp,' 'our handkerchief,' will occur. This peace has remained with me during the eight and a half years of my life here, and has never left me even amid the greatest trials.Įverything in the Convent delighted me, especially our little cell. I found a welcome in your arms, dear Mother, and received the embraces of another family, whose devotedness and love is not dreamt of by the outside world.Īt last my desires were realised, and I cannot describe the deep sweet peace which filled my soul. At length the doors of the Carmel closed upon me. It was a sight to gladden the Angels, this old man giving his child to God while she was yet in the springtime of life. He, too, knelt down and blessed me through his tears.

I embraced all my dear ones and knelt for my Father's blessing. Oh, the agony of that moment! One must have experienced it in order to understand. I did not shed a tear, but as I led the way to the cloister door my heart beat so violently that I wondered if I were going to die. At the moment of Communion, when Jesus had entered our hearts, I heard sobs on all sides. The next morning, after a last look at the happy home of my childhood, I set out for the Carmel, where we all heard Mass. These farewells are in themselves heartrending, and just when I would have liked to be forgotten I received the tenderest expressions of affection, as if to increase the pain of parting. On the evening before, we were gathered around the table where I was to take my place for the last time.

Monday, April 9, 1888, being the Feast of the Annunciation, transferred from Passiontide, was the day chosen for me to enter the Carmel. CHAPTER VII - THE LITTLE FLOWER ENTERS THE CARMEL

St therese little flower autobiography